(This is a repost from our old blog. It was originally posted on 15th March 2009)
I’ve been quiet in the blogsphere for a while, as there have been many other things going on … but with a little more time on my hands just now I’m hoping to be a bit more active.
The first thing I want to write about has been on my mind for a while. On February 25th the Wall Street Journal published a letter from a reader:
“My wife and I both work and every year we pay a tax penalty for being married. Every year, I suggest we get divorced and keep living together and not tell anyone. Many of our friends in similar situations live together and stay single. At what point would it be practical to get divorced?”
What do you think of that? The WSJ columnist of course responded “Are you crazy, what part of ‘God hates divorce’ don’t you understand?” Not! She carefully provides the caveats about the IRS’s position on such maneuvers, provides details about the income points at which the tax penalty kicks in and carefully notes the potential financial downsides. And at the end, … “Also, don’t forget the imponderable effects a tax-driven divorce might have on your relationship”!
Now let me say that my beautiful wife Myra is a homemaker, and our earnings don’t take us anywhere near a “marriage penalty”. But if we did jointly earn $200,000 we’d happily pay $787 for the privilege of being married. And I’m wondering about the guy who wrote the letter. What marriage vows did he take? Do you think they included “For richer, for poorer” or “till death us do part”? We have to help people take the covenant promise of marriage more seriously. And here’s another thing … our tax-challenged inquirer might not be hearing a very important message from his wife. Notice they’re still married, although he suggests this money-saving divorce device every year? One of my favorite books about women and their inner lives is “for men only” by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn. Based on scientific surveys and hundreds of interviews this great little work explains a LOT about women that most guys just don’t get. And check this out … when asked, 70% of married women would rather deal with financial struggles than struggles arising out of insecurity or lack of closeness in the marriage relationship. Mr tax-victim is making his wife feel threatened and insecure, over a few hundred dollars a year.
Of course the Bible bottom-line on this sordid little query (oops, did my prejudices show?) is given in Ephesians ?5:25: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and ??gave Himself for her,..”. Did you get that? Jesus died for the church … his bride. Let’s not think about nickel-and-diming our marriages to death!